Snot, Watermelon and Poo Juice.

You're probably wondering, "Gracie, what the hell is up with your title?!" right?  Well. Let me just tell you.

Yesterday I stayed home with Monkey.  Sunday afternoon on our way home from the lake, Monkey spiked a fever and puked in the car.  He was promptly bathed, dosed with Motrin and loved up on.  Monday, he was still feverish and Grandma stayed home with him. Yesterday, it was my turn. 

This poor child already has allergies so a virus/sinus infection on top of that and you can imagine the snot factory he has become.  Crusties, runners, and globs of snot and boogers. Yea! It's bad enough that you could hang pictures on walls with his boogers because they are so freaking sticky and gross but pair that with allergies...it's a recipe for... Hey. There's an idea!!  Talk about a money making scheme.  I could just package them up (he's a factory anyway right?) and sell them. I'll call it "Booger Tacky: Hangs anything, Anywhere!"  LOL  Booger Tacky.  Sick.

Speaking of sick...

So, in case you have no earthly idea what my favorite fruit is, it's watermelon.  I. LOVE. WATERMELON. It is super yummy.  My dad, over the weekend, picked a really good one and we cut into it this week. Monday night to be exact.  Tuesday morning I sat down on the couch, with a big 'ol slice of it, while Monkey was playing. He was wearing his diaper and a little pajama t-shirt. He climbed up to where I was sitting, went to turn around to sit on my thigh, and smeared poo juice on my damn arm!  (Note: for those of you who are unaware of what "poo juice" is, essentially, it's diarrhea.  Sometimes, little ones have runny diapers and the diaper doesn't quite contain all of its...contents.  It happens. Any mother can tell you "poo juice" stories. YOUR own mother can probably recall a poo juice story of your very own.  This is one of Monkey's. LOL)  So, I'm holding my watermelon plate and I feel the air hit a now wet streak on my arm.  I look over, no discoloration. Upon a smell check however...*hurk* (that's me gagging) I had indeed just been poo juice'd.  "GROOSSSSSS, Monkey!!!!!"  He was like, "What?"  He doesn't talk yet, but that was the look he gave me.  Pure and innocent, "I have no idea what you are freaking over, mom." I got up, put my plate on the table and promptly took him to change is "juicy" diaper.  Because his little butt was priority (he gets diaper rash easily from acidic foods and diarrhea) and I was able to wipe my arm with a wipe at his changing table, I washed my arms up to the elbow before I sat back down with my watermelon plate. 

Knowing he had a fresh diaper on, I was not squeamish about him attempting to climb into my lap again. I should have been. Once seated, he looked at my plate of yummy, wonderfully delicious, sweet watermelon...and sneezed all over it.  ALL over it. Not one piece was spared.  And once I was able to tear my eyes away from my now ruined watermelon, I looked at him, and he smiled so big at me that I busted up laughing.  Goof ball.  I love that child. Seriously.

Ciao!