The men...

As promised.

The posts for Mr. G and Mr. Italian will be consolidated due to Mr.G's brief interlude in my life.

Mr. G, who I was "introduced" to by Mrs. Adventure was a brief blip on the radar in the scheme of things.  It all started with Mrs. Adventure and myself talking about how most men in my life have just been disappointments, jerks, or full blown assholes.  The Mistake (refer to "who the heck...") was not the beginning of the domino effect but was a key player in the game of "Hurt Gracie".  The very next one was BD.  Then Mr. NRN... So why not Mr. G? Right?  But Mr. G never really "hurt" me...and Mr. NRN didn't either except for the whole "good enough to sleep with" but not ready for a relationship crap.  Please...no one will ever get this cow's milk for free again...buy the beef retard or you can kiss the rump goodbye.  OK, that was dumb... he he.  Funny, but dumb.  Off topic...

Mr. G and I corresponded through emails in the beginning.  Apparently, he is painfully shy and has been burned in the past (who hasn't?!) and wants to be chased. I realized that all of our conversations were initiated by me.  Maybe not all,...but a great majority.  Most all of the questions were being asked my me.  And the only reason he even remotely knows anything about me is because I have volunteered the information!!  Well, not only was that NOT OK with me (b/c I was on that same path with Mr. NRN after a while). My girlfriends have finally convinced me that I am worthy of being chased and that I should hang up my running shoes and just let them chase me.  I must admit, I love the thrill of a chase.  But I am making attempts at feeling more comfortable being the chasee.  So, I did an experiment. 

Day one of the experiment I did not send my typical "Good morning" text.  It took several hours, but finally Mr. G sent a text, which I answered.  A short conversation ensued and then the conversation came to one of those points...you know.  The point where you feel like you should say something that is usually meaningless and pointless just to keep the conversation going.  Mindless chatter that if face-to-face would feel like one of those awkward silences where both of you are fidgeting and desperate to say anything to break it.  Well, I decided not to fill the void with mindless chatter and see what happened.  I wanted to see if his interest in me would take over and drive for him.  I didn't hear another word out of him until much later that same night.  So, we had gone the entire rest of the workday, all afternoon, and it wasn't until around 7 p.m. that he sent me a text message that said, "You must have been busy. I was too."  (No, actually I'm trying to figure out if your interest goes beyond the surface. Are you willing to go beyond conversations in which I have started to dig a little deeper and find out what makes me tick?  Do you even want to know what makes me tick because you don't ask much about me.  Granted, you haven't had to because I have been more than willing to just let my trap yap without the slightest idea of whether or not you're truly interested. So, let me just see about this...)  A few texts are exchanged and then...nothing.  The next morning (Day two), it took a little while again but the text did come through.  Again, short and brief and then...nothing.  That was the last time I heard from him. It's been several days.  In fact, he mentioned to Mrs. Adventure just today that he hadn't spoken to me in a few days.  Wisely, as she does not want to get in the middle of it, she shrugged it off.  As far as I'm concerned, I will not continue to chase a man.  I doubt I ever will again.  How else will I truly know for sure whether or not they are interested in ME?

I don't even know where to start with Mr. Italian.  You already know that he is my ex-fiance from 10 years ago.  But what you don't know is that there was a time in my life where he was my very best friend, lover, confidant, and head over heels in love with me.  Mr. Italian and I met while I was still in high school through a mutual friend of ours.  We didn't start dating until a little while later when neither of us was attached to someone else.  He was young, and stupid, as was I and we got engaged when I was 19.  He didn't have a pot to pee in, I had nothing myself.  My dad actually told him no when he asked to marry me for that reason.  Long story short, I broke off everything after I moved back to Texas with my family.  I was not prepared to get married and live with his mom.  Not that it's a bad thing,...shoot, I live with mine right now!!  (I don't think there is anything wrong with moving in with your parents for a brief stint if you have fallen on hard times.  BD walking out on me while I was 9 months pregnant?  Yeah, that qualifies.  Having a wife and children and getting laid off?  That does too...  But to start your life together in your mother's house?  Uh. No.)

We briefly saw each other while he was with his ex-girlfriend a few years ago.  I had come to visit his mother (who has ALWAYS loved me to pieces) and his brother (who I graduated high school with) while I was stationed in San Diego.  Mr. Italian and his ex walked into the house.  I was not informed until last night that she used to call me something along the lines of a "butch dyke bitch"...or something or other.  The "reasoning" behind this was that I was a female Marine, and had a short hair cut.  Now...just because I was a female Marine meant nothing more than I was a female Marine. I am, and have always unfailingly been, strictly dickly.  And as for my short hair cut, it was a cute (and I do mean CUTE) short angled bob.  Kinda shorter in the back and angled down my jawline. And that was when I was wearing it red.  I started out with it long but due to the protective head gear that we wore (I was an avionics technician on the F/A-18 Hornet) and the migraines I was getting from them and having long hair constantly bound and up, I cut it.  But it was cute short, not "dyke" short as she put it.  Funny thing about her saying that is she never said it to my face.  She had the opportunity. I was sitting right there.  She musta been scared I was going to show her what it felt like to have the driveway (I would have drug her outside so as not to get blood on mom's carpet...) wiped with her face a few times by a "butch dyke bitch" female Marine.  Scaredy cat.  Besides, she was just jealous that I was much prettier than she was.  I'd have been jealous of me too if I were her...

That was the last time I actually physically saw him.  He texted me several weeks ago and we have been in touch ever since.  He partially blames himself for my 10 years of dating disasters, failed marriage, and knowing what abandonment feels like by my child's father.  I don't know how he justifies my poor judgement in men as partially his fault but he said it's because he didn't grow up fast enough.  Hmm...  And he doesn't talk about flying out to see me or flying me out to see him.  He talks about flying me AND Monkey out, or coming to see us as in Monkey and my family as well.  It never slips his mind that I have a small child and when I asked what he was even doing talking to me (after he had just told me that he doesn't consider single mothers as potential dates anymore...he says they almost always use their children as leverage) he said that he knows me and loves me. And he understands that I am a package deal now. And if wanting me includes me coming as a package deal with Monkey, then he is more than willing to do so.  (What do you say to that?  Lol That's a really good answer.)

There's more to it than this of course but seeing as how BD just pissed me off to no end,...it's probably better if I save some of it for another time.  Wondering what happened? Sure. I'll tell ya. 

BD has a habit of saying he wants to come up and see Monkey and then not doing so.  (BD lives two hours south of us.)  Last week, he said he was going to come up this week and see Monkey.  Well, I was in the midst of making plans with Mrs. Adventure and thought to ask him if he was still planning on coming up.  I was not surprised.  He said no because he didn't know it was Father's Day...  WTF?

Ciao.