Since my last post about the guy I'm interested in and the 90 days of Alaska,...I have been talking to some of my girlfriends both new and old. The opinions and advice were overwhelmingly similar and I thought that was good because that means I pick good friends. lol
My previous blog revealed that I have been in a monogamous "friends with benefits" situation with a man for a little over a month now. During that month and a half, I somehow lost a little bit of my spunk and sassiness (even though I vowed not to ever do that again after the last idiot I was with, who happens to be my son's father...) and have decided to reclaim it. After all, it was MINE to begin with!!!
The girls, after listening to some of the history and events behind Mr. NRN and I, their advice was to stop initiating contact (be it via texting or calling) and to just let things go. See what happens. Maybe it will allow him time to think and that I should be prepared for it to go either way. He'll either get up there and realize that I'm no big deal and that he can live without me in his life, or (and I hate admitting that I want this to be the case) he will get up there, have time to think about me and the whole situation, and come to the realization that I'm a good hearted woman, faithful (not easy to find these days), and that he would actually be the one missing out if he let things go himself. It's like one of my besties (Ms. Adventure) said to me yesterday, if he doesn't call, then I should feel very "unimportant" to him (and I absolutely would!!) and that he should be placed in my life exactly where he places me in his. It stings, but it's the truth and that's what your besties are for. Another one of my girls (Mac) told me yesterday to let the Lord guide me.
**I have been absent from the church for a great number of years. I recently decided to go back since I think it will help me lay a solid foundation for my son and help me in raising him. I met Mac through her husband (Big Mac) with whom I work. (Great people and I am blessed to know them.) I drive roughly 45 minutes, one way, to get to the church we all attend. Mac told me that it is obvious that I have a thirst for Christ and am trying to put myself back on the right track, otherwise I would not drive all the way out there to attend church. I happen to really like the one I found out there.**
And in letting the Lord guide me, and striving to live a better life than what I have been, He will bless me. In making these changes in my life, I've realized that I DO want to go to church. I DO want a man in my life that will attend church WITH me. I believe that couples (married or even just dating) have a stronger foundation when they go to church together. And, I DON'T want someone who will not be willing to do these things. There's big trouble in a relationship when you're not on the same page. I cannot tell you how TIRED and DRAINED I am from all the "big troubles" in my relationships.
SO, in an attempt to right my life and pull this out of control bus back onto the road, maybe I'll gain the strength I will need to put away the door mat on my face, start to love myself, find happiness in life. I don't know what's going to happen in terms of Mr. NRN. I'd be lying if I told you I didn't care. I do care. A great deal, in fact. And I hope that if he hasn't already, that he figures out that he cares for me also (if that is truly the case). He's not a bad guy. We've just gotten ourselves into a situation that isn't the best and I fell for him just a little too hard because I didn't guard my heart.
This is Day One of ninety (that Mr. NRN will be gone) and Day One of getting on the right path because it's what I want to do.
**I have been absent from the church for a great number of years. I recently decided to go back since I think it will help me lay a solid foundation for my son and help me in raising him. I met Mac through her husband (Big Mac) with whom I work. (Great people and I am blessed to know them.) I drive roughly 45 minutes, one way, to get to the church we all attend. Mac told me that it is obvious that I have a thirst for Christ and am trying to put myself back on the right track, otherwise I would not drive all the way out there to attend church. I happen to really like the one I found out there.**
And in letting the Lord guide me, and striving to live a better life than what I have been, He will bless me. In making these changes in my life, I've realized that I DO want to go to church. I DO want a man in my life that will attend church WITH me. I believe that couples (married or even just dating) have a stronger foundation when they go to church together. And, I DON'T want someone who will not be willing to do these things. There's big trouble in a relationship when you're not on the same page. I cannot tell you how TIRED and DRAINED I am from all the "big troubles" in my relationships.
SO, in an attempt to right my life and pull this out of control bus back onto the road, maybe I'll gain the strength I will need to put away the door mat on my face, start to love myself, find happiness in life. I don't know what's going to happen in terms of Mr. NRN. I'd be lying if I told you I didn't care. I do care. A great deal, in fact. And I hope that if he hasn't already, that he figures out that he cares for me also (if that is truly the case). He's not a bad guy. We've just gotten ourselves into a situation that isn't the best and I fell for him just a little too hard because I didn't guard my heart.
This is Day One of ninety (that Mr. NRN will be gone) and Day One of getting on the right path because it's what I want to do.
Good for you Kel, XOXO.... your Mrs. Adventure.
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